We’re not going to make it.

people-1492052_1920Life can be really hard.  Yes, hard.  When it comes to finances, it can be down right depressing.  We live in a time where it takes money to live, even more money to live comfortably.  The bills add up from day to day .  Loans, credit cards, school loans, utilities, cable, insurance, car payments, rent, the list goes on and on.  Some days you honestly think to yourself, I’m not gonna make it.

The ones who aren’t struggling, are probably thinking, “Well, if you went to school and made something of yourself, you wouldn’t be in this predicament.”  Yes, you are very right.  I’m sure if I would have done things differently, things would be different.  I’m also sure if I did go school that I would be in debt up to my eye balls in school loans.  Not only was I too poor to afford school but my parents also made too much money for me to qualify for assistance.  Catch 22? Absolutely!



Month after month we stack up our change and barely scrap by.  We spend our days working and saving just to have the hard earned money ripped from us the same time every month.  God forbid you be late on a bill, so you have to pay double, so your extra gas money that you set aside gets sucked up.  Present money you put aside to get your nephew some books or a cute outfit gets sucked up from late fees.  Sucks? You know it.  It gets depressing and overwhelming.

If you’re anything like me, you try to see the best in everyone and everything.  Yes I struggle financially but I’m blessed.  I have a family, food, a job and roof over my head.  Times get rough and money ends up being more important than anything.  Even God.  That’s where  things come to a screeching holt.  Through others struggles.  God sends me an old man in a Walmart parking lot who helps me put my groceries in my car.  He then proceeds to point at his mouth because he’s hungry and can’t speak English.  What’s his story?  Was he ripped from his country?  Is his family alive?  Are they still in the middle of a war while he tries to make a life in America? I don’t know.  As I scrape the bottom of my purse for the last remaining dollars I have, I all of a sudden don’t feel vey poor.  I feel selfish and angry because I don’t know what poor is.

Jesus reminds us that we are to serve our neighbors.  He wants us to be help those who are struggling.  He wants us to know that we aren’t poor, we are blessed.   He is the spring of living water and he invites us to come and drink.  John 4:14 says but whoever dinks the water I give them will never thirst.  Indeed the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life.   When you hear someone say, “We’re not gonna make it.”  You remind them, Jesus already made a way.



The Fatherless


Some of us don’t have fathers.  As blunt as that may sound, it’s an unfortunate truth.  I’m not talking about the fathers who have passed on to the next life.  No,  I’m talking about the fathers who are in the land of the living but choose not be a father to the humans they’ve created.  This is not a “bash all fathers” blog, in fact is the complete opposite.

Not having an active father in your life causes a plethora of insecurities.  It gives you a sense that things are not complete.  It also gives the whole “she’s got daddy issues” a whole new spin.  YES! We have daddy issues, thanks for noticing.  For me I feel like it’s a step further than daddy issues, because I had a wonderful dad when I was growing up but then he sorta checked out.

My way of dealing with the abrupt absence of my father was looking for security in men.   This was a very confusing and troubling road and was also long.  In the midst of this journey, my relationship with God was also pretty rocky.  I was very resentful and also mad because I didn’t understand why not only was I abandoned by my dad but I also couldn’t keep a relationship going with a man to save my life.




After a long road of fighting and loving hard for all the wrong reasons, the Holy Spirit found me.  I prayed that God would take away, the desire of a man filling the whole in my heart.  I prayed that I wouldn’t try to define myself through any human being.  It was the most beautiful journey I have ever been on in my life.  The gift of the love, unconditional love from Jesus flooded my soul, and made me feel whole again.  It didn’t happen over night, there was lots of praying and journaling and reading through the word.  I completely immersed myself in the trinity.  So if you are sitting there, where ever you are and feeling fatherless, know this, you have a heavenly father.  I know it feels really bad right now, but believe  me sister or even brother, God knows your heart.  He will find you and love you the way you deserve to be loved…